Healeysville Dingos and Champagne

It was goodbye to Mario, our favorite waiter, and creator of fabulous flat whites. We were off to Healeysville. We found a charming little hotel in the center of town.
Healeysville is known for its Wildlife Sanctuary and we saw the most amazing array of animals- platypus, wombats, kangaroos, and a spectacular birds of prey show.
The creatures in Australia are fascinating- and unique in all the world.

The other thing that Healeysville (and surround) is known for is wineries. We stopped at Domaine Chandon for a lovely lunch of wine and chesses – with a great view of the vineyards.

Koalas and The Little Penguins

We hit the streets early to do a walking tour of downtown Melbourne. The downtown area is filled with old Victorian arcades and tiny alleys with sidewalk cafes.

We finished our self guided walking tour in time to jump on the tour bus taking us to see the famous “Little Penguins”. Our bus driver, Ross, actually knew a few things- so the ride down to the coast was interesting. The houses along the seashore were spectacular and the water views were beautiful. Our only disappointment was that we weren’t able to stop at the Giant Worm museum. We passed by and had to rely on Bryson’s description of these 12 foot long earthworms (only 6” in diameter).

As with all “bus tours”, they had to fill the day with activities. Our first stop was at the Warrook Cattle Farm and a chance to see kangaroos up close and personal. With soaring temperatures and glaring sun, the roo’s were doing just what you’d expect—nothing! No bouncing kangaroos hopping across the fields. Most of them were just sacked out under the shade of a tree. All the “ducks” were finally loaded back on the bus. We’d forgotten how much we detest these group tours. There’s always someone that shows up late-or is just completely obnoxious. This tour was no exception. We had “the horrible Heb”- who actually had the nerve to ask the driver/tour guide to stop talking so he could sleep. We not only had the “HH”, but also a group of Chinese tourists who completely disregarded every instruction the driver gave us (including the one telling them not to leave cigarette butts on the ground because the penguins eat them and die).

Our next stop was the Koala Conservatory in Cowes on Phillip Island where we actually got to see these adorable little creatures in their natural environment. Like the kangaroos, most of them were sleeping- although, sleeping is their normal state. Koalas are basically one of the laziest creatures on earth. Their day is spent eating eucalyptus leaves- and snoozing.

Back on the bus and off to the Nobbies to make a quick dinner stop and then the highlight of the day, the march of the Little Penguins. These tiny creatures leave in the morning to head out to sea to collect food for their babies. At dusk, they all head back to the beach and make their march back to their nests. Things are not good for the little penguins- the food supply is dwindling and many of the parents can’t find enough food to feed their babies. It was heartbreaking to see the little birds, obviously hungry, looking for their parents- completely dependent on them for their food.

It was time to head back to the bus- and our long drive back to Melbourne. We, of course, were the very last drop-off. It did give us the chance to talk a bit more with Ross who had us howling with stories of tourists from hell. Imagine-one tourist blamed the bus driver for the lack of penguins on the nightly march.

More Melbourne

Two days and we already had a regular breakfast spot. The waiter was an Aussie version of Bob Hoskins and quite a character.

We decided to take the Victoria Market Food Tour….a 2 + hour walk through the market with stops for a few samplings of the amazing variety of meat, cheese, bread, wine, and fruits.

We had to make a quick exit from the tour to get back to the Melbourne Gaol to se the Ned Kelly mini drama. Set in the jail where Ned met his end, it was quite an entertaining and informative glimpse into the last days of Ned Kelly. After Kellyland and the convoluted story of Ned’s life and “career”, it was good to get a more true-to-life version. The Gaol also has the armour worn by the Kelly Gang, the last gun used by Ned and his death mask.

Williamstown

Leave it to us to take an open air boat – in the blazing sun – with no a/c or sunscreen. While our fellow boaters lathered on sun screen, we just got pink. Fresh off the boat in Williamstown, we decided to take a tour of the island with a local guide and Ike, his black dog. As John says, “The steepest slope on the mountain is the expert slope”….and Williamstown wasn’t exactly steeped in fascinating sites, but it was interesting to see the historic houses and Ike’s special tricks. Originally the main seaport on Port Phillip Bay, it became a secondary port when the Yarra River was deepened and the Port of Melbourne was developed (circa 1880)

We took the train back to Melbourne and stopped at Victoria Market to check out the market- which was mostly junk. We watched some pretty serious rain clouds forming, so we beat feet back to the room and had a dinner of cucumber dip and wine.

Marvelous Melbourne

We started the day at Café Norra – drinking our flat white with Italian opera playing. We walked to the center of the city and caught the Melbourne Explorer bus- the big red, hop-on-hop-off tour bus for a quick city overview. We made a stop at the Immigration Museum, located in the old Customs House. The displays had replicas of ocean liner cabins to give you a sense of shipboard life for immigrants of different periods.

We had lunch at the Kimchi Café- and with garlic reeking from our pores, took the tram to the Visitors Center to plan our trip to Tasmania. With reservations made, we took a brief tour of the Melbourne Gaol. The Gaol is Victoria’s first prison and one of the oldest surviving buildings in Melbourne. Well known as the place where Ned Kelly was hung in 1880, it also has an interesting history of prison life in the 1800’s. Prisoners were kept in solitary confinement, forbidden to talk and forced to wear silence masks. Death masks were made of the executed prisoners and these masks were used for scientific analysis – trying to better understand criminal behavior. Since we were late, they gave us a return pass for their Saturday show on the last days of Ned Kelly.

Notes on Melbourne: The Aussie accent seems much stronger to us. The city has a much more relaxed pace than Sydney. The architecture is a blend of Victorian and modern. And the flies—this was our first, but not last introduction to the infamous Australian fly…more later.

Melbourne also has a strange traffic pattern- If you are driving in central Melbourne and want to turn against the traffic, you don’t get in the middle lane, but rather pull over to the curb- as far as possible from where you want to be- and sit there until the light changes- and make your turn from there- as quickly as you can before the light changes.
Dinner was some Turkish bread, wine and cheese in our room.

Australia Day and a Visit with Ned Kelly

We had originally planned to stay in Canberra for Australia Day, the Aussie 4th of July. But, after two days and a glance at the schedule of events, we opted to get on the road.

We had yet another long Australian drive. We started to understand Bill Bryson’s description of “Civilized Australia”—that part of Australia from Brisbane in the north to Adelaide in the south and west. That area covers about 5% of Australia’s land surface and nearly all of its important cities. In the whole of the continent, this is pretty much the only part that is conventionally habitable. They call it the “Boomerang Coast” because of its shape. We found that anything – even a minor tourist attraction – provided a welcome break from the everlasting drives.

Our first stop was at the Dog on the Tuckerbox. The story of the dog was put into verse when the Australian pioneers were traveling in bullock wagons, pushing their way into the unexplored interior. The story goes that a dog accompanied every wagon, as a faithful friend and guardian of the teamster’s possessions. “And the dog sits on the tucker box, five miles from Gundagai.”. Based on the verse, a monument was built at the Five Mile celebrating the pioneers and their faithful dogs.

As we drove, Bill Bryson’s book provided entertaining stories of his travels in Australia- and also provided a great tour guide. We were laughing hysterically reading his description of the Ned Kelly Museum in Glenrowan. A look at the map and we realized that with a minor diversion, we could experience it first hand. So, it was off to Ned Kelly’s Last Stand and KellyLand. Unlike the U.S. with it’s western law enforcement heroes (Wyatt Earp, etc), the Aussies have no “good guy” heroes. Their folk heroes are all bad guys- Billy the Kid types- known as bushrangers. The most famous of them is Ned Kelly.

The basic story - Ned came from Irish stock - a fairly lawless group. He spent years on the run from the Australian police and when they heard that he was hiding in the town of Glenrowan, they headed off to arrest him. The town had heard of their plans and so the entire town was waiting when they arrived- hoping to see a real gunfight. Ned came out from his hiding place at dawn-dressed in a suit of homemade armour. Since the armour didn't cover his legs, the police shot him in the leg. He managed to make it to the woods where he was captured. The police escorted him to the jail in Melbourne where he was tried and executed. His famous last words - "Such is life". Since then, his life has been romanticized in movies- one starring Mick Jagger as Ned- and books.

In a typical Aussie town- a few pubs and stores, the highlight of Glenrowan is the "World Class Tourist Attraction" - "Ned Kelly's Last Stand". We were the only people waiting to buy tickets- but based on Bill Bryson's description- knew that this was one tourist attraction we didn't want to miss. While there's no way to compete with Bryson's description of what came next, I'll give it a try.

The "show" begins in an old saloon - with a long bar, some dummies- some standing by the bar, some sitting around table, a German Shepard and all of the old timey bar paraphanalia. Suddenly the lights dim and shots are fired - when the room got lighter, the dummies started to move (not like Disney animatronics, but stiff, jerky movements), the piano would play, a boy on a trapeze swung back and forth - and the German Shepard lifted his leg on the bar. It really was so bad that you had to love it!

Once this scene was played out- we went through a series of rooms - not really sure what we were looking at. In fact, the story was so incomprehensible, that we went to the café next door and asked the locals about the real story. We couldn’t leave without a photo of the proprietor of Ned’s Last Stand – and he proudly showed us his latest addition to the show- an 8’ tall Ned Kelly head (in armour) with eyes that light up. You just had to see it to believe it.
With spirits high, we continued our journey towards Melbourne. The plains turned golden, the landscape became barren and arid. We drove for miles and miles with the same scene out the window. Then, almost like Dorothy’s first sighting of the Emerald City, we turned a corner and could see Melbourne beckoning on the horizon. Suddenly, the arid, empty scene turned to busy city streets and store fronts in multiple languages – Turkish, Arabic, Thai, and Chinese.

With no detailed map, we followed our nose into the center of the city and found our way to our hotel, The Downtowner on Lygon. We dumped the car, threw our bags in the room and headed out on the streets. Our hotel was located at the border of the CBD and Little Italy. We took a stroll into Little Italy- blocks and blocks of outdoor cafes and restaurants- Italian, Thai, Greek, Turkish, Nepalese. The touts were out- everyone offering free wine, free appetizers – just “try my restaurant”.

Canberra - "Why Wait for Death"

After another wonderful breakfast, we started out for what would be one of many long drives through Australian countryside.

We had read Bill Bryson’s account of the visitor’s center in Cowra and the amazing holographic presentation of the historic prison break. During WWII, there was a large prisoner of war camp outside Cowra. On one side were 2,000 Italians, on the other side, 2,000 Japanese. The Italians were model prisoners. Many, happy to be away from the front lines, made the best of things. They worked on local farms and were only lightly guarded. Their officers weren’t guarded at all.

The Japanese, on the other hand, refused to work or cooperate at all. The shame of capture was so great that many gave false names. Then in August 1944, 1100 of them staged a massive breakout in the middle of the night. They burst from their barracks with a banzai cry and charged en masse at the guards clutching baseball bats, chair legs, and any other weapons they could find. The guards poured bullets into the mass but were quickly overwhelmed. Within minutes, 378 prisoners had escaped into the countryside. It took 9 days to round them all up. The furthest any of them got was 15 miles. The casualties were 231 Japanese killed and 112 wounded.

At the visitor’s center in Cowra, there were photos and artifacts-but in the back room was a holographic explanation of the breakout. You sat in a darkened room, music began to play and suddenly one of the people in the photo in front of you appeared to step out of the picture and started to walk around the objects and talked about Cowra in the 1940’s and the prison breakout. The girl, about 6” tall, was 3 dimensional and it was the most amazing way to bring history to life.

We arrived in Canberra, headed to the Visitors Center and got a great weekend deal at the Hyatt Hotel. Canberra was exactly as described by Bill Bryson. It was chosen as the capital of Australia in 1901. Because Sydney and Melbourne were so closely matched, the new nation decided to build their new capital somewhere in the bush. They formed the Australian Capital Territory (a federal zone on the model of Washington, D.C.) The city is cold in the winter, blazing hot in the summer and in the middle of nowhere. It is one of the world’s largest planned communities in the world. It is also forty miles off the main road from Sydney to Melbourne and there are no rail lines into it. And, the only approach to the city from the west is a dirt track.
It was a very strange city – all lawns and trees and hedges and a huge ornamental lake in the middle. But, there was no sense of the city. We opted to walk to the War Museum from our hotel. We walked for what seemed like miles past non-descript blocks of 60’s style buildings. Finally we reached Anzac Parade and had a sense of deja-vu; it was like being in the Soviet Union. Excessively wide streets with a huge green space in-between. On either side of the “promenade” were tributes to the wars fought by Australia.

The War Museum was truly impressive. We took a 2+ hour tour with a very knowledgeable guide. The museum focuses on the history of the wars that Australia has participated in.

We walked and drove all around the city, looking for any semblance of activity or feeling of a vibrant city life. We found nothing. Attempts to make pedestrian friendly malls were populated only by 16 year olds on skateboards. We did manage to find a lovely Indian restaurant and used our dinner to plan our escape from Canberra.

Once again, Bryson’s experience came to mind. After an endless day of walking and trying to find the soul of Canberra, he ended up at a bar, drinking and making up slogans for Canberra:

“Canberra- There’s Nothing to it” or “Canberra-Why Wait for Death?” or “Canberra- Gateway to Everywhere Else" *

*From Bill Bryson's book, "In a Sunburned Country" - a MUST READ for anyone making the journey to Australia!

The Blue Mountains

We woke to a wonderful breakfast in our room- served by Marian and Trevor. We had hoped to go on a bushwalk with a local naturalist---but the storm clouds let go just as the car was coming to pick us up. While we really wanted to see more of the rainforest, the idea of a 2 hour walk in pouring rain didn’t seem too appealing. Now, we had to find something to do inside. We opted to visit the IMAX theater for their showing of “The Edge” – an IMAX film shot in the Blue Mountains- with waterfalls, underground caves, and some very annoying Gen “Y” explorers.

After the movie, the weather was still iffy so we set off in search of a “view”. With the spectacular beauty of the Blue Mountains, you would think that there would be 100’s of restaurants with a view. Not so. We finally found an old hotel, the Hydro Majestic that offered us a pub with a view.

For dinner, we decided to pick up some wine and cheese and settle into our beautiful room and watch DVD’s.

Sydney to the Blue Mountains

We had our gay-dar on at breakfast. A few doors down from our new hotel was an outside café filled every morning with a very interesting mix of people (and their dogs)
It would become another of our favorite places in Sydney.

It was time to pick up our rental car and venture out from the city. We decided to explore the Blue Mountains. Part of the Dividing Range, the Blue Mountains were initially the impenetrable barrier to white expansion from Sydney. With no reservations in a popular weekend destination, we stopped at the Visitors Center and found a room at a small B&B in Katoomba. The Melba House was an Edwardian house converted to a 3 room B&B and run by a lovely British couple, Marion and Trevor.

With a darkening sky, we decided to try our luck at “Scenic World”. After taking a near vertical ride down to the base of the rainforest on the railway car, we took a walk through the forest. John convinced me that the ride back via gondola would be a yawn compared to a ride back on the railway car. (The railway runs to the bottom of the Jamison Valley. It was built in the 1880’s to transport coal miners and at a 45 degree angle, is one of the steepest inclines in the world). We ended up in the last car (first car if you were heading down). You literally felt that you were going to fall out of the car as it edged up the 1 mile track. There were no seatbelts or anything to hold you into the car. It was simply hair-raising.

We made it back just as the thunder clouds rolled in and the rain started to come down. We stopped for a drink at the Carrington Hotel, a beautiful old hotel with a grand veranda and then grabbed dinner at a great little Thai restaurant.

Sydney and the Ferry to Manly

Hotel 59 was booked for the next few days, so we had to drag our roller bags up the street to the hotel a few blocks away. It wasn’t much to look at, but the staff was friendly and helpful and the price was right. With the dollar tanking daily, even budget hotels weren’t any bargain.

We headed out with our Lonely Planet and followed their walking tour of Sydney. We ended at the Opera House and took the tour of this magnificent facility. The Opera House was once the site of a municipal tram garage- but in the competition between Melbourne and Sydney, the Sydney officials decided to put up a concert hall in the city. They held a competition for the design and ultimately chose a design by a Danish architect, Jorn Utzon. Construction began in 1959 with an estimated cost of $7 million. It turns out that the roof was top heavy and just working out the construction of the roof took five years (the entire project had been projected to takes six years!). The project was completed in 1973 at a final cost of $102 million.

Outside, the views of the Harbour Bridge were spectacular. The Opera House and the Harbor Bridge are the ultimate picture postcard of Sydney. The bridge was completed in 1932. It stretches 1650 feet- and the same year that it opened, the Bayonne Bridge in NY quietly opened, and was found to be 25 inches longer.

The day was sunny and bright and the ferries were beckoning. We raced to the docks, bought a ticket and ran onto the ferry to Manly. Even on a Friday, the place was filled with Aussies out to enjoy the sun and beaches. We found a spectacular little Thai restaurant across from the water then walked to the beach to check out the scene. John took a few photos of the girls in their skimpy suits and struck up a conversation with an old guy who had come to Australia years ago from Sicily.

Once back at Kings Cross, we were determined to find a pub. Heading the other direction from our hotel, down Victoria Street, passing the strip joints and Internet cafes, we found a beautiful outdoor café by a fountain. Our luck- it was happy hour – two for one. After many, many glasses of wine and an interesting conversation with a local – originally from Serbia, we headed home.

Sydney

Another breakfast sandwich and “flat white”. Then we were off to Circular Quay and to the Rock’s Walking Tour.

We hoped to find some great ethnic stall at the Chinese market- but instead found a Chinese Chelsea.

Sydney has vitality much like an American city. The CBD was packed with attractive Aussies going about their business day. The women were quite attractive and substantially endowed. The current style appeared to be the tank top with spaghetti straps, bra optional. We coined them “Tittie tops”.

They love their coffee as well. Coffee bars were everywhere. We decided to explore the area around our hotel and headed down Victoria Street- filled with restaurants and coffee bars. But, if you wanted a beer or a glass of wine, you had to order food. Still feeling a bit slow, we opted for an early dinner at Uno’s (bad schnitzel and Greek salad- but the beer and wine were good).

Sydney

It’s a strange feeling to lose a day of your life…crossing the international dateline and January 18th never happened. Of course, you do get it back on the way back. Even more strange is to travel 20 hours to find yourself in a place that looks so familiar. No unintelligible languages, strange clothing or dark skinned people. It was like arriving in Seattle- good looking blondes with signs for products we know, people speaking English- with a charming accent.

We arrived in Sydney at 6:00 am on Wednesday feeling no worse for the wear. Our bags arrived; we got our luggage cart and headed to the shuttle area. Everything was working well. We got into a crowded shuttle and started our Sydney adventure. We were, of course, the last drop-off. Most of the other tourists were staying in the center of the city. We were staying in the Kings Cross area- known for it’s’ prostitutes and gays. Our hotel, Hotel 59, was a basic place, but the bed was large and the bathroom was clean. We felt remarkably good so we dumped our bags and got a bit of breakfast at the hotel café. It became one of our favorite breakfast places- with small tables out on the sidewalk and great breakfast sandwiches. We did have to learn about ordering coffee in Australia. You have to order color (black or white), a ‘tall’ or ‘short’ (big or small) and then an angle (flat or not). We learned quickly that the best of the options was something called a “tall flat white”, although we never did figure out what the ‘flat’ part was all about.

After a “flat white” and a sandwich, we were off to explore Sydney. We managed to find our way to the Quay and the Sydney Explorer bus (a hop on –off bus) for an introduction to the city. We hopped off at The Rocks, the site of the first European settlement. It was historically a dangerous place- for convicts, prostitutes and street gangs. In the 1970’s, it was rediscovered and made into a historic tourist district- full of cobblestone lanes, colonial buildings and tourist shops. We found a quaint little pub with an outdoor café and stopped for our first Toohey’s, Sydney’s local beer.

With our handy guidebook, we set out to find a recommended Indian restaurant. On the way, we saw a sign for Korean food and we headed in for a wonderful dinner. We managed to get on a local bus to get us back to the hotel. The bus driving style was horrendous—heavy on the acceleration and slamming on the brakes. You definitely want to have a seat on these buses or you’ll find yourself sprawled in your neighbors lap. We made it back to the hotel at 7:00 pm and were asleep by 7:15.

Australia Map and Route

Off to OZ!

The dog was with Mom and E.D, the paperwork to put the house up for sale was signed and there were no impending worldwide disasters like bird flu on the news. We had our new dual band cell phone for any emergencies. We were ready to roll. After 3 years with no international travel, we were definitely ready for an adventure outside of the U.S.
Kenny Presley (Elvis’ cousin) from TGO picked us up for our trip to Orlando airport. We were leaving just before the TGO Board of Director elections so we had an interesting discussion with Kenny about all the recent nasty politicking. He agreed that it was amazing to see grown-us acting like the “mean girls”.

Check in was uneventful and we were soon heading off on the first leg of our journey- to LAX. We got into LAX with just enough time to buy a few magazines and a NY Times, get our Australian visa and get onto the next plane for our 14 hour flight to Sydney. United’s aging fleet was matched only by its’ aging flight attendants. Our spirits sank as a group of 50 Aussie teenagers boarded the plane yelling “Party in row 38” (we were in row 36). There was nothing to do but try to close our eyes and pretend we were somewhere else.