A Town Called Alice

Entries from Jean – In White My comments in Italics:
The next day, Monday February 14th – St Valentine’s Day, was spent mostly continuing our journey to Alice Springs. We did almost 700 kilometres in 40 degrees of desert sunshine. Gordon and John shared the 6 hours of driving which started at 9.30 a.m. The Sturt Highway was something to behold. In every direction – for as far as the eye could see- was red earth covered with a brittle grass called spinifex, low bushes and lunar looking rocks. The sky was brilliantly blue and makes a mockery of Montana’s claim as “Big Sky Country”- and the sun was blistering. The clumps of spinifex have needle sharp points (which, if they break off and become embedded in your skin will fester into horrible sores). It was definitely a place that you didn’t want to be stranded in…
And, the road stations are great fun- check out the Road Station in Erlunda.

As soon as we arrived in Alice (about 3:30), we headed for the tourist information centre where we got good rates on our hotels in town, and accommodation in Yulara and King’s Canyon. Kaye had told us there were no hotels available in town but we got a good one for the first night only and then an equally good one for the following two nights – no need to stay in an out-of-town camp site as she had planned. After we checked into the hotel, Jean headed directly for the pool, while I did some much needed laundry. The boys, as expected, checked out the town to find a local dive bar. They found it at Todd’s Bar—locals- big men and big women. Could there be some inter-breeding going on? We had dinner that night in an Indian restaurant and an early night as we were exhausted after the heat and the tedious journey.

The hotel we moved to next morning was very central to the town, its name was the Aurora and we stepped out the front door right into the shopping mall. It was very similar to a lot of towns and didn’t have much going for it except for its location in the middle of the desert. First on the agenda was the purchase of a new leather hat for Gordon and fly-nets for us all – you would not believe the millions of pesky flies in Alice. And they are so persistent!! Swatting them becomes part of life like breathing, in fact we named that particular motion as “The Australian Wave”. The fly-nets are green and sit on top of your hat and then fall over your face and you tie it at the neck otherwise the blighters will find a way in. What did we look like? But no-one gave us a second glance as all the tourists are similarly clad though strangely not the locals. Obviously the flies prefer fresh blood.

Anyway, now that we were suitably clad we headed out to a place called Standley Chasm which was supposed to be a local beauty spot. I have to say it was a bit disappointing. It was a trek to get there in 36 degrees of scorching heat, battling a million flies and when you got there, it was just a deep chasm between two rocks and not really worth the effort – I could’ve lived without it though we agreed that if anyone asked, we would say how wonderful it was. A bit like the ‘King’s New Clothes’ really.

We headed back to Alice for a lunch of Doner Kebabs and then Gordon and John went for a cold beer at Bo Jangles while Debs and I got some retail therapy. This is a town built for tourists and that’s what most of the shops are geared up for – it’s a rip-off of course but I managed to find a nice plate for Ann and a lovely polished wooden box for me and one for Debs which I gave her before we left at the end of the holiday.

In the afternoon we visited the Flying Doctor Base which was quite interesting. The service was established in the 1930’s to provide medical aid in emergencies for the remote areas of Australia. Today they cover more than 7,150,000 sq kms. Dinner that night was at an Australian/Swiss/Indian restaurant, an odd combination but which had been recommended by Billy Connelly in his TV programme about the place. I had the vegetarian option which was delicious and then we bought wine and sat outside at the hotel drinking and talking shit – just what we do best.

There are lots of Aborigines in Alice Springs and without doubt, they are one of the ugliest races on this earth. They drift around the town in packs which can be quite intimidating. We were told that they would approach us and ask for money or alcohol but we were to give them a wide berth, especially at night, which isn’t a hard thing to do as they smell to high heaven. I believe we were told that buying them alcohol was unlawful. These are Aborigines who have been disowned by their own communities, usually for drunkenness, and they sleep in the centre of town in a dried up river bed. They are universally disliked by the white Australians (who we found to be very racist anyway) and somewhat of a headache for the Government. I have to say that I saw no endearing qualities in those in Alice Springs despite a wish to come down on the side of the “oppressed natives”. We didn’t like them either.

Next day, Wednesday February 16th, we had breakfast in the hotel at 8.30 then headed out to the Alice Springs Desert Park. This was a sort of safari park with areas for kangaroos, birds etc and we enjoyed it despite the searing 40 degrees of heat and the inevitable million flies. (Run by the Parks and Wildlife Commission of the Northern Territory, they’ve recreated three primary desert habitats- one very dry, one with a little moisture, and one that is normally dry but occasionally is swept by flash floods. As you walk through the park, there were several large walk-in enclosures containing birds and other small desert animals – bandicoots, possums. There was a large nocturnal house housing all sorts of marsupials – numbats, quolls, and potoroos. It was not only amusing to find these small creatures in the dark – but the enclosure was wonderfully cool and a break from the heat of the park. We started off watching a display of wild birds - falcons, eagles and the like and then wandered round the other displays. It was too hot to stay long though so we headed back to Alice and Bo Jangles Bar. Gordon and I thought we’d go to the Botanical Gardens while John & Debs gave it a miss because of the heat. It proved disappointing though – not much to see and too hot to walk around anyway. I had thought it would be a cool green oasis where we could have relaxed in the shade but couldn’t have been more wrong. We didn’t stay long. Dinner that night was at a restaurant called Oscars where the staff was rude and the menu touristy so we soon headed back to the hotel for a glass or two of wine and an early night.